Review – I’m Not A Fan, But The Kids Like It!

Why do I get the horrible feeling that the kids don’t like it. Anyways; brokeNCYDE, a screamo-crunk (lolwut) group from Albaquerque. And they’re pretty much the worst thing to happen to music in the past decade. After forming in 2006, and releasing three different EPs, brokeNCYDE finally put out their first album on June 16th, 2009.

‘Tis the day that music died.

This album is what could only be described as a disgrace to all things musical. It’s a mashup of everything that you should never, EVER, do when recording an album. We can all learn from the things that go on within this album.

Let’s see, where can we start with this monstrosity? I suppose the best thing to talk about are the lyrics: Allow me to sum them up in one sentence. “Fuck all ‘dem bisches in da club bro.” That’s pretty much it. Every single song is about sex. Whether you be drunk, high, or a combination of the two while gettin’ some, it’s all about getting freaky. I was left desiring some… oh, I dunno, creativity in this stream of garbage. The vocals themselves are awful, as well. You have “Se7en” (creative name, right?), who is constantly wailing in your ears in the most painful was possible. For the note; through almost every song, he screams the same thing over and over with no change in the way he does or the lyrics themselves. And then there’s “Mikl” (…what?), who raps really really badly into your ears and causes more bleeding than Cannibal Corpse and Insane Clown Posse combined. And finally, we have “Phat J” (How clever…), who growls in a way that would make Nergal of Behemoth want to bury him alive with how horrendous it sounds.

But! They have four members, don’t they? Ah yes, how can we forget “Antz” (Wow…)? The guy who doesn’t so shit except control the lights and smoke effects on stage. So, basically, on record, he’s useless. Phat J does all of the synth stuff, so don’t think Antz is there for the only part of this album that is slightly musical.

Is there anything redeeming about this album at all? Well, it’s kinda catchy. But these definitely aren’t songs I want stuck in my head all day.

I really question how these idiots developed such a massive fanbase, but hopefully those folks will all come to their senses soon enough.

TL;DR: The most pathetic excuse for “music” you can find today. It’s an absolute disgrace to screamo, and an even bigger disgrace to the music industry.

Key Tracks:

• None, they’re all horrible.